He was alone, crying in his hospital crib.
Carefully manipulating the foreign attachments to his body – one feeding tube and a blood pressure line attached to his ankle, the IV taped and secured to his right arm, I picked him up.
I sat on a small couch, my back to the window, the three month old baby on my lap facing me. Through his gurgled wheezing, he looked at me, this stranger in Child Life volunteer garb.
I told him many things; about how I was glad his surgery was over; how he sounded better than the week before. I perched him on my shoulder so he could look outside and told him the sun was shining but the air had a nip of cold attached to it. He whimpered at the new position.
I settled him back on my lap.
We talked about how it’s not always fun to be alone, how we need to be understood and cuddled sometime. I told him he had a lot of growing to do, a lot of people to meet, about the new adventures yet to come.
I looked into his eyes and saw myself there. I wondered then, if he also saw his reflection in my eyes and if he, too, felt the human connection.
Had I not looked closely in his eyes, I would have missed it.
Thank you, little one, for allowing me to see myself in your eyes.
A simple breath, the bubble forms
then floats in search of things adored
keen awareness, filling bareness
collections placed and interlaced
a meaning soon restored.
She dipped below an ocean wave
And gave with grace a treasure saved
of centuries old, its story told
seasons more to yet unfold
A single pearl unscathed.
From Collections from Breathing – a WIP book of poetry
“Erase all thoughts from your mind.”
“Melt into the floor and think of nothing.”
I don’t know about you but I find it extremely hard to think about nothing.
The lights are out now. I guess that’s supposed to help.
I’m laying on the yoga mat (didn’t do Yoga but “all-in conditioning”). Body is tired and yes there is a bit of “melting” going on if sweat pooling beneath a torso counts.
Think of nothing.
I’m not good at this. All I manage to do is think about how to think about nothing.
What are the other seven people thinking about in their “nothingness”?
How does anyone think of nothing?
I try not to think about the errands I’ll be running when class is over, about what I’ll be photoshopping when I get home, about how to improve the playground that I’ve set up for my grandkids in my backyard.
I stare at the back of my closed eyelids.
Better. It’s dark there.
I’m thinking about how dark it is. But there is nothing to touch, nothing to see.
I’m a little bored.
And then I see it.
A wee wisp of floating light.
A silk scarf in space illuminated by a moon that sits somewhere out of my line of sight.
Or is it a star sliding sideways in slow motion leaving a jet stream of light?
Nah, it’s an angel thread,
an angel fiber,
I’m still thinking. I’m thinking of the perfect word to describe that thing floating in my blackened vision.
“Start moving your fingers, your toes. Open your eyes,” she says.
What? It’s time to get up?
I’m not finished thinking of nothing.
Forgive me if I’m buggin’
and I do a little pluggin’
But I’ve got a bit of news I’d like to share
You see, the inspiration
Came from grandkids fine donation
Of ideas of which they planted I ensnared
I made a little book, you see
of children and diversity
So I posted it without an ounce of qualm
And if you’d like to see it
If only for a wee bit
you can find it now on Amazon.com
Yes, You Can! available on Amazon.com
When I am with you
how fragile are the eggshells beneath my feet?
Will they break with the slightest touch?
A mere cast of any eye?
Should I walk with feet bare
or can my soul and thoughts be bared and shared
without fear of injury
or to me.
Mostly, to you. My back is strong.
Yet, I will not avoid the eggshells.
I will say they are as strong as Ostrich eggs
and stand on them without hesitation
without burden of breakage
with hearts in tact
communication an easy commute
We do it from time to time. Right?
I’ve seen you do so (when I wasn’t disappearing).
“WordPress? Blogging? Later …” you’ve said.
Well, here’s a quick re-emergence, a brief “shout out” to say,
GIVE ME A MINUTE. I’M ON A ROLL.
When flying, they always say “place the oxygen mask over your own mouth and nose before assisting others”.
This is a reminder to always take care of yourself first and, if lost, reclaim your position in life.
I so miss my fireflies,
but these will do for now.
Special thanks to Linda G. Hill for posting the above photo at #1linerWeds.
(Top image is from my hand and mind)
If you stay on one side
and I the other
how will I know the color of your eyes
what tune your voice plays when your words lilt into the air?
How will I know if humor is one of your senses
or if the shoes you wear have traveled far?
I want to know what made you grow
and what kept you stagnant
what made you smile
and what made you weep
If you stay on one side
and I the other
how would I ever be